SENSE OF HUMOR & THE STRUGGLES ON PARENTHOOD
The moment I found out I was pregnant, changed my life forever. I thought “Oh crap, what have I done? What am I going to do? My life is over.” My feelings are quite unpopular, but I do believe they are more common than admitted. One of the things that got me through the dark times during pregnancy, and still does today as a parent, was/is my sense of humor.
After 10 years of marriage, my husband and I decided not to “try” to get pregnant but simply “not prevent it” and put it in the “hands of God” while calling his bluff doing the whole “well, at least we can say we tried” dance. God played a joke on us and showed us that he has his own sense of humor.
Needless to say, I had an appointment with a therapist booked within the first week I found out I was pregnant. One of the things I discovered through therapy, was how important having a sense of humor is. Mine is dry and sarcastic and is something I have carried with me through this journey called parenthood thus far.
I have also been suffering from post-partum depression, so that’s been fun! One of my first ways of coping with PPD through humor was whenever someone would comment on how fast I lost the baby weight. I always responded with “Oh thanks. It’s the Post-partum depression diet. I don’t recommend it.” Don’t worry though, after I started the meds, I gained a ton of weight back. Oh, the joys of motherhood. Just when you thought pregnancy was the part that was going to make you fat. (By the way PSA, can we just stop thinking it is our right to comment on women’s bodies? I know most mean well but, come on. Haven’t we moved past this yet? I guess not. But that’s a whole other topic for a different time.)
Another example of how I used humor was when I found out the sex of my child. I would be lying if I said I didn’t have a preference. I was team girl ALL the way. We had already decided that this child would be our one and only, so I really had my heart set on a girl and visions of going shopping, getting pedicures and buying ALL the cute girly things. And then along came the genetic testing results. Boy. Boy? What in the world am I going to do with a boy?
After many tears and going through all the stages of grieving the daughter I would never have, it was time to move on. Our families live out of state, so we decided to mail out cards revealing the baby’s sex. I was going to put cute, pink confetti into the cards to show that it was a girl. But since that dream was shattered, I thought of the next best thing, GLITTER BOMBS! I found the prettiest royal blue glitter and just dumped it all over the cards. Needless to say, some of our family members did NOT appreciate the mess but, eh, they got over it.
We all have our baggage and true pain but finding a sense of humor through it is a great way to cope with it. No matter what you are dealing with in life and what stage of parenthood you are at, find your sense of humor. You are going to need it. As they used to say back in the day, “Buckle up Buttercup.”